Starstruck. NaPoWriMo Day 3

original

City of stars
Are you shining just for me?
I want to reach out and make mine
your diamond dusted shine
Pull down the crystals from that velvet sky
Your reflection – undiminished in my eyes
Hungry for your celestial touch
I tiptoe on the edge; sudden rush.
Could I take the plunge?
Plummeting to earth. For a split second.
Before I rise up to you forever; to the diamond dusted shine that beckoned.

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Don’t. Not by Ed Sheeran.

“Don’t take risks.”

“Don’t speak your mind in front of the world”

“Don’t travel alone.”

“Don’t trust anyone, even your closest friends.”

“Don’t retaliate if someone in the train elbows you out.”

“Don’t get distracted from your academics.”

“Don’t take art seriously.”

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Mêtieta

Her phone chimed and she sighed at the message that popped up on the screen. Slightly shaking her head, she drew the pattern to unlock her screen and begin the cyclic discussion about “he’s not good enough for you” and “you deserve better”.

She immersed herself in the helplessness of a star crossed lover.

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Resolution Restoration

Raise your hand if you feel that at one point or the other 2016 sucked – personally, professionally or just in a more global sense. If you didn’t raise your hand (mentally that is. I know nobody will move a muscle physically) you need to lock your 2016 experience in a time capsule and save it for a rainy day because you were an exception.

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Dear Friend Who Once Was

To my former best friend,

How are you? I hope that you’re doing well. Genuinely, I do hope you’re doing well. Life is pretty great for me, here. Did you join a masters’ course right out of college? Or are you working at some firm? I’m sure that you are doing great in whatever you are doing.

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Love Heals

You’re a swirling ocean,
I’m a lonely tree.
You have life inside you, you’re living the dream.
I sway in the wind, still rooted here though
while your perfect blue waves are free to touch the shore.

I watch you change your colors now
The sun shares its glamour then the moon shines down
I can look breathtaking, just wait till fall
But seasons can be slow, time seems to crawl.

I stand here in wonder at your blues and greens
I think back to the time when that’s how vibrant I’d been.
You wouldn’t notice me now, I’m too damaged and brown
If you touched me, your waves crashing, I’d probably drown.

I’ve heard you through the wind, felt the brine from your waves.
Watched as you spread across to the distant caves.
You’re too extensive, you’ve touched many shores
I’m pretty much the simple,shy, tree-next-door

As I stand here watching you, there’s not much to do,
a sudden wind tugs at my leaves and they head right to you.
I watch mesmerized as they fall on your face
And in that moment our distance is erased.

The sky should clear out and I should hear music, they say
but there’s no electric feeling yet, just a storm heading our way.
The clouds gather up and crawl over you
making your pretty blues change to a darker hue.

I’m mesmerized still, by your beauty and poise
I’ll be content to just hear your voice.
The wind, that prankster, is howling still
bringing you closer to me, maybe I could touch you now – maybe I will.

But as I’m hit with another gust my gaze falls to my right
There are younger trees standing there.
All a wonderful green, all so bright.
Their perfection could match yours
but not me, I’m inept.
But I’m content here with just having that moment we did.
My leaf engulfed in your depth

The thunder picks up and you’re growing bolder
I can see you rise higher than you normally do.
The clouds they laugh with you and then suddenly – my world changes too.
It’s raining, there’s rain drops on my face
My trembling branches feel that touch, your embrace.
You gently caress my few remaining leaves
Maybe this is what humans call going “weak in the knees”?

You cover me up gently and I feel stronger now
This proximity must be a dream. You say its true, I don’t know how.
You moved the sun and moon and pushed yourself higher
Lost parts of you to the greying clouds’ desires
And yet you say it was worth the loss, for it’s not commonplace
to feel what you felt when my leaf touched your face.

You smile at me and I’m still in a daze.
We sway together, wrapped in a tight embrace
I may be weak but your strength is there
I could soon be green but I dont think you’d care.
You see me as I am and accept me now.
I ask you again, is it still true now?

You’re a gentle ocean
I’m a lovestruck tree.
You have life inside you
I’ve found life inside of me.

Dear A

Dear A of May 2036,

How are you? Still going to respond with “All good. Chilling. What’s up with you?” I really hope you don’t. Get creative. I don’t write a lot of letters anymore, especially letters to myself, so this could be a bit mixed and muddled.

Now that the formalities are out of the way, I have some things I need to tell you and I don’t have much time. I’ve got errands to run and a lot of work on my personal projects. Essentially, I’ve given myself a pretty brief window to get this done. I wonder if you remember what that urgency feels like or have you become complacent? That pressure to fit a million tasks into a single weekend. Never stopping to try to take advantage of every precious minute of quiet. How down time is never truly relaxing, because you have an unending list of chores from over the week where your mind starts racing and calculating right from Friday evening. Exactly how much time do I have? Should I fix up my ever messy wardrobe or finish that book I’ve borrowed from Chow and still not started? Or do I spend the weekend just talking to Mum and Dad which I don’t do enough over the week? How do I fit in that meeting I promised with friends? Maybe I should get started on learning that extra language, after all it will take at least a month. Should I go see the dentist or push that to next weekend and just finish up with the ophthalmologist? I don’t have enough time for both. If I squeeze in a 30-minute quality time session with the parents, because I was home late the whole week because of work, I’ll still have maybe an hour left. Is that enough? Should I go to the gym or write a letter to my future self? Quite a few permutations possible here as you see.

I wonder what it’s like now that you’re older. How do you fill your time now that you don’t have to constantly think about that assignment due next day or that ‘catch up’ with someone, which is really just a forced socialization event? Does sitting down by yourself for ten minutes to listen to some Sia and sip on some cold coffee, which is what I’m currently doing (no coffee spills on the laptop, yay), still feel like heaven?

I really have so many questions for you. Mostly about the 10-year plan I had and ‘opening up’ that I struggled with. Do I still piss off people by not answering calls? Do I still disconnect and respond with a Whatsapp? Is Whatsapping still a thing? Did I ever meet J.K Rowling? Did the gold-purple dream come true? Is Max Zuckerberg famous? Are there more Fast and Furious movies being made? Am I still an awkward-side-hug person?

But I know you can’t answer me. That doesn’t matter anyway, all my questions will be answered in due time. So, I’m not writing in search of answers from the future, although how cool would that be? *cue Terminator music* I’m writing to help you remember.

Work just got a bit relaxed a few days ago. I know it won’t last though. There will be another “sprint” to get deliverables done on time soon. There have been a lot of changes recently, in life in general. K and R officially quit work and are off to a whole new world. K continues to say and do things that worry J and me enough to feel like over-protective moms already – we’re only 23 K! Don’t do this to us! R constantly amazes us with his whimsical trips to Bangalore (or anywhere really), endless party scenes and boundless energy. Full disclosure — that last one often frustrates me as it results in plans where I’m hounded to join while Chow gets a free pass to exit.

The home front is excellent. There are many long nights filled with intense discussions over what food to eat, what new activity Dad wants to pursue next and which types of tumbling stunts and impromptu karaoke sessions are and are not appropriate at 12:00 AM as I am not the only person living in that house. You probably don’t remember much of this, at least not with any level of detail, meaning you still have that ridiculous goldfish memory. That might be a good thing in some ways, but there are some things I need you to remember.

Last week I met with P. She left for yet another adventure, this time to Rajasthan. Go make us proud love. She senses when I’m frustrated and ranting and immediately says – “Are you happy?” It took me by surprise the first time she asked me that. It’s a question you expect from your therapist and you know how I’ve always been the therapist but never had one. She is definitely not therapist-vibed. But anyway, it struck a chord with me because it’s exactly what I ask my friends anytime they are in crisis. I’m prone to my share of dark moments and self-doubts. You know that better than anyone. Being the alpha in your mind and projecting that is hard work. It’s tedious. It can be very exhausting at times.  But for some reason, happiness and sadness aren’t the first feelings I associate with any of it.
Maybe because I agree with that person on Buzzfeed in that they’re mutually exclusive. They’re just two tiny drops of an ocean of emotion upon which I float (since I can’t swim yet, hopefully you can) as each day unfolds. There’s happiness and sadness, but there’s a mix of other hues – equal parts frustration, exhilaration, self-doubt, guilt and nostalgia. And even more. I don’t think I’ve ever considered big picture, abstract feelings as revelations. Or particularly important. It’s the seemingly insignificant little moments that matter most and those are the ones you should remember. Those are the ones I need you to remember.

I need you to remember K’s quirky, wildly imaginative 8-year-old personality. How we make silly jokes about our trips to lands unheard of, despite R being the only one who will probably go through with that plan. How she’s always recreating scenarios for us by acting it out, like the one where she made a failed attempt to get a haircut super early. How she comes up with an animated face no matter what is going on. She even comes up with a story for us to pass the time while we’re in an Uber, heading to a promising dinner, complete with the proper inflection, facial expression and delivery. Even one-liners that make me double up with laughter.

And remember how bad R was at winning an argument because there was always strict enforcement of your logic? I mean, like all-time bad. He actually prefers to begin a conversation with “Okay I know I won’t win this argument but still”, which is probably for the best, because otherwise, we could probably argue for hours and we’d give K a panic attack, while J would just sigh and shake her head at how her ‘kids’ have turned out.

And I will always love how K ascribes feelings and personality to inanimate objects — always making sure to say sorry to the elevator or the door that she banged her foot against. She has a huge heart, which I hope you have made her protect well. And that heart really shines through when she interacts with R. R just cracks up at everything K does. They really do fit perfectly. The male and female version of the same personality.

And I need you to remember J and her childish nature which can just as quick turn to the responsible older sister who must protect the little ones. Not unlike Chow. Or maybe quite unlike Chow, who peeps in from the background to make sure no one messes with the dynamics of the others. The omnipresent responsible one and the ever present reliable one. I hope J is just as animated and bubbly as she is now. It’s rare to see someone who can keep her calm for others no matter what goes on behind the scenes. She really does give the best advice.

Speaking of behind the scenes, you need to remember the one who watches over them all – Mits. Did you visit her in the land down under? Did you guys collaborate on a piece? Remember how you spoke to her over the phone for more than an hour but did not feel the usual annoyance at a vocal correspondence? I need you to remember, your heart may seem frigid to all those outside, but the people who matter know the reality and see past the “alpha”. In fact, they mould the alpha into a warmer person.

The ones that count towards happiness or sadness and are the bulk of your life have given the moments I need you to remember most. The family you are so fortunate to be a part of. I need you to remember how when I have an argument with Kibs, mostly about being a moron and not growing up fast enough to not be “spoon fed by instructions” every time, he does it with the best intentions. I know you know this now. He yells, I grit my teeth and by the end of the very annoying conversation, he looks at me through the screen and says “Kiddo, I just want everything to be perfect for you. I don’t want to see you struggle like me.” And then we go back to normal.  Our normal. I can’t name the feeling I have every time I work towards the dream. It’s a bit of everything. It’s joy wrapped in a cloak of anxiety with a bit of self-doubt thrown in. I feel anxiety on your behalf. And for x-years-from now me. Because I know everything changes so quickly. For instance, nothing makes you fixate on the passage of time like having a close knit relationship with your parents. Just this week, Mum’s started insisting on quality talk time before we go to bed. I started this months ago, but now it’s become a kind of daily ritual. The day I’m in a non-karaoke-at-home mood, she, or Dad for that matter, make that extra effort to be goofy and make me smile. Maybe it’s just a parent thing. But I know things change and of course I get my fear of unsolicited change from them. Any day in the future, this ritual could change. It could become a thing of the past, or maybe it is already a thing of the past and we just don’t want to acknowledge it.

I could go on and on about these three, really. There are so many things you need to remember. Why? Because they deserve it. I know you. I know you ask yourself sometimes if it was all worth it. What if you don’t live up to their expectations? What if their faith is too strong? What if you’re not as good as they think you are? Because there were sacrifices and obligations and even compromises. Every family makes them — putting a career on hold, setting aside personal goals, giving up free time, helping you cross over the struggle they went through or even saying goodbye to sleep for a few years. The sacrifices are different for everyone, but they are real. And it’s okay to call them what they are. Sacrifices. Ones made willingly. Honor the sacrifices they made for you and use them to fuel your fire. You have always wanted to do nothing but make them proud. Do just that, by remembering why that is your life goal instead of fame or riches.

For me, it’s these moments and details that make everything okay. Because these people and their actions let me know, through all the ups and downs, that I am doing something right and will continue to persevere. No matter what words I might choose to describe my emotional state, my family and friends are happy. Except, of course, for the times they hate me for cutting early from hangouts or refusing to stop singing Cheap Thrills in the hall while the neighbors’ dog barks in sync. But overall, for the most part, in this finite moment in time, they are happy which makes me happy. And no matter what happens in the future, that’s real and it’s valuable.

So, despite the many changes between now and when you read this, try not to be too sad about them. You were very lucky to get the chance to make all these memories with the precious people who are hopefully just as important. It’s truly the best thing we’ve ever done.

Sincerely,
A of May 2016

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Image source : wineandcheesedoodles

We click, because we clicked

It’s been a long day without you, my friend.
And I’ll tell you all about it when I see you again.

Seriously though, it’s been way too long since I wrote something. Which is why I didn’t hesitate to go check out the very first poetry slam event I heard about. No better inspiration than raw emotions set right in front your eyes, right?

Performing however, was not part of the plan. A very close friend, who I went with for the slam, decided to mark “Yes” on the question “Would you be interested in performing?” when booking the tickets. I discovered the feeling of stage fright. Not pleasant, guys. Not pleasant at all. But just as in any piece of work written by The Bard, the plot thickens.

It’s the day before the event and I have had zero time to write anything specifically to perform. My laptop is full of pieces, sure. None I’m comfortable sharing with a room full of strangers.
It’s the morning of the poetry slam. My mind does an instant “ruh roh” like Scooby Doo. What do I recite? How? Off a paper? Of my phone? Will I be the only one who doesn’t memorize and perform? These thoughts accompanied me to the pretty little, extremely hidden, location of the event – The Hive.

Wonderland wouldn’t hold a candle to what that entire day was for me. Starting from a small room with all the people huddled around a small spot, the day shot off like a sprinter who had no finish line in sight. People came up and spoke their hearts out. Memories were relived, tears were shed, we laughed at the tragedy of paper napkins(!) and there were stories shared that made me shudder at the plight of humanity. More than 25 wonderful souls lay bare for us all to consume.

Now truth be told, I’m not a people person. The day started off with me being extremely awkward and anxious. But that thought slowly ebbed away and was replaced by this inexplicable feeling of being among my own, despite being in a room full of strangers! I’ve felt adrenalin back in school when I was involved in sports, but nothing compared to the rush I felt as I walked up, in my poorly chosen heels, to the center of the room. All I could see was a pillar right in front of me. Being true to my reputation of being Chandler-ish, I instinctively started off with some humorous monologue about life and the feeling I was experiencing right at that moment. There were chuckles. I wonder now if that was just because they were being polite.

Owning the platform, I decided to drop my pretense and bare my thoughts to this group. It felt wonderfully easy. I rambled on for a while and read out two pieces that have been quite important to me –Saviour and Tumult. <<Shameless self promotion>>

The words ended and there was applause. I faintly recall a few clicks during the reading. I should probably explain the click, or as it is termed in the world of spoken word – snaps. From http://gotpoetry.com :

It lets the performer know they’re being felt, not just heard, without disrupting the flow of the piece like laughter (which is still good) and groans (which may or may not be good) and applause (always good) or standing ovations (awesome bordering on magical). I know when I’m up there and I hear some fingers snapping, it makes me feel like I’m really doing something, especially when it’s a whole room of cats.
*   *   *
I think it has to do with the volume of the presentation and the old idea of not disturbing the reader.

For a further reading on this, make sure you check out this article about the history of snapping. The event lasted a staggering 8 hours. The original setup was just planned for 4 hours. That’s how much we all bonded. We hooted and cheered and whoop-whooped for all the performers. And the team that made it all possible of course.

Despite the numerous cheers and compliments I got for my readings, there were a couple of things that I cherished at the end of the day. There was one lady who read a poem she had written after her father passed away. I couldn’t help but fall in love with the way she spoke and just the aura of gentleness that I suddenly felt. Aunty, if you’re reading this, thank you for being the highlight of the day for me. Thank you for your beautiful words and also for your appreciation after every single person finished performing.
Of course, a massive accomplishment for me was to face a live audience and not hide behind my computer screen while sharing my thoughts. It felt surreal.

But perhaps one of the key things I gained that day was the happiness of knowing, there are many others out there who share with others. I feel blessed to have all my readers, who give me an outlet for the thoughts of the bumbling baboon in my head.

Here is to all of you out there reading, writing, sharing and feeling all the vibes in this world. Stay whimsical!

I Believe I Can Fly

I do believe I can touch the sky. Just not on a daily basis. It involves getting out of the house and I just *sigh* do we have to? Welcome , Whimsical Ones, to a whole new unedited section of Whimsical Wonderwall. You get the unfiltered author views in a bid to make you guys feel more connected.

My very first piece is based on my absolute dislike to “hang out” and “chill out” every waking moment. Or on lazy days. Just FYI, everyday that I do not need to get out of the house is lazy day.

antisocial

NOT me.

 

intro

Still not me.

 

 

Anybody who knows me from back in junior high will testify to the fact that I cannot be classified as “shy” and “reticent”. About 40% might have thought I’m self centered though. (I’m probably working against my point by naming this section “Know Me Series”). I cannot be considered antisocial. Kanoon ke haath lambe hote hai. Nobody wants to mess with the law,right? Right?

Let’s just get to the “not sociable or wanting the company of others” part. This is true in part. I’m the type of person who is nice and cordial to everyone new but willingly mixing with people is something I do only with a select few (hey that rhymed!). I have no qualms in meeting new people. It’s just that I prefer spending my free time doing something indoors and that’s not where you “meet new people”. Unless you’re stalking people online or maybe reading interesting blogs which connect you (not in person) with someone who has similar thoughts *wink wink*.

So what do I like to do in my free time you ask? Writing, reading, playing music(for another time on “Know Me Series”). I catch up on TV shows, global news, football games. Most importantly, family time. Weekdays are pretty routine with a travel-work-travel-home schedule and there isn’t much time to catch up with the family. Hence, my free time, which is almost always the weekend,is reserved for my parents.

These are the core reasons, but of course there are a few more that result in the following scenario every time someone says “Hey, let’s hang out Friday night!”:

Unless said hanging out means sitting at home in PJs, eating delicious food and watching something hilarious.

24 Things Only People Who Hate Going Out Will Understand

Because me at a club or a party would not be fun for anyone. It would look something like this:

24 Things Only People Who Hate Going Out Will Understand

or possibly this:

Or best case scenario, like this:

Now I’m not saying I hate meeting people or I like being alone. It’s more like I’d rather not go through all the prep. I will jump out of bed on a Sunday morning for breakfast with one of my closest friends but for general loud,wild,through the night, glitz and glam parties, I repeat:

Of course I can’t always avoid going out. Even my parents push me to go out for a coffee or something. You just gotta man up and deal with it then:

And for your bravery you are, sometime in the future, gifted by the Gods of Relaxers with a magical “cancelled plan”. You can never see how happy I get when someone cancels a plan I had to be cajoled into joining. But I suppose it looks something like this:

JK, I’m never that low-key when good stuff happens:

So what have we learned today?

24 Things Only People Who Hate Going Out Will Understand

Thanks Liz.

 

A Dead Aim for Love

People who read my blog know that I am inclined to write about the turmoils and also victories of love,friendships,relationships and self confidence. Our guest post for this week is from a talented lady who not only puts thoughts to paper in words, but also through art.

This week features a short yet impactful piece by Ishita Das, who I have the amazing honor of knowing personally. There are some pieces which go on for pages and you get more and more invested in them over the course of reading through the volume. But sometimes, there are just a few words that grasp your immediate attention. This piece is one of my personal favorites in recent times. After reading through some of her work, I was intrigued to know Ishita’s mindset when she created them.

“I wrote both of them back in second year and don’t think I can ever surpass them! I also have a more personal relationship with ‘A dead aim for love’. All the unrequited love that we all have had in our puberty. A little cynical I suppose but nonetheless true. We are crushed and for a while are numb and again we gather ourselves to move on to the next one!” 

I hope you enjoy this as much as I did. Poetry is an art and this sure is a masterpiece.

A dead aim for love,
A bulletproof vest for affection,
And a martini for the after.
Life’s grand, isn’t it?

Evolution-of-Love

Image source: ernievecchio.com

Color Collective

I am yellow today
I shine my light out like the sun.
I am white today
Soft and quiet like new snow.
I am blue today
Calm as glass and cool like the sea.

We know our lives are full of color, bright when our mood is top notch, blue when we feel sad, green with envy-it happens. Creative visualization by an amazingly gifted young man is what’s being featured today. A mosaic of colors, patterns and textures by the very talented Umair Ali Qureshi, this piece speaks to all.

 

“The inspiration for this work comes from moods. This piece has been done over a couple of weeks and that is possibly why many people can relate to it. The translation varies,depending on the way the audience perceive things, surroundings, evaluations of life (so I’ve been told!) and even the simpler things like a vacation well cherished. The mosaic of colors is meant to remind of the volatile human nature. Hope or sadness, wisdom, confusion,clarity…a eureka moment if at all . It speaks on a very broad level to different people.”

Check out Umair’s finest work: https://i.instagram.com/qureshi22_09/

The Stages of meeting your Carmina inspiration

“One of us had always been in love with the other. One of us lived in a perpetual state of longing.”

Stage 1: Vehement Denial

No, you are not romantically interested in her. Nope. No. Your heart is being Wile E. Coyote and she’s the Road Runner, but hey, that’s normal behavior, right?

Stage 2: The Mental Wheels

Nothing needs to be anything unless you say it out loud. Your brain is working in overdrive picturing your first conversation with her. Maybe it’ll be on a long walk. Maybe it’ll be over texts. Maybe at a random day post movies when it’s raining and there is stereotypical music playing softly in the background. But it’s all in your head. You’re not doing anything wrong.

Stage 3: The (Anti)Social Setup

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In a world of Grey

As far as I can remember, being in love has almost always been compared to a drug. It’s an addiction that engulfs your being. When in love, you go through a tumult of emotions, all with the same person. You get depressed when you fight, but then once you reconcile it’s an inexplicable feeling of euphoria, like a drug addict fiending for a fix who finally gets his hands on some. Continue reading

Sparks Fly

There will come a time when you find someone. Someone with whom you can finally open up about every painful, difficult and life altering event that’s ever happened to you in your past. This is when the demons will resurface Continue reading

Saviour

A quick grin, a chiming laugh
A shake of the head, a dismissive chortle
The life of the conversation, undebatable.
Jests, comments, jokes follow
Breaking into peals of laughter, irrepressible.
Continue reading

Losing to Loneliness? Celebrating Solitude?

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The terms “lonely” and “alone” are often times used interchangeably. If you’re someone who equates these words, stop. In a mad world full of I’m-in-a-hurries and uncountable sorry-I’m-busies, I think we all just need to sit down, read and understand W.H Davies when he said

What is this life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare?

I understand the need for the rushed lifestyle we all now lead but like every other machine, the human mind and soul needs to rejuvenate. This is solitude. This is being alone. Perhaps introspection is sometimes a result of being lonely too. If so, it’s usually involuntary. What is this fine line between being alone and being lonely? Why will people label me as a loner? What makes me seem alone? More importantly, which should I be? Continue reading

Prompted Rant (Day 1) : Morality vs Logical Reasoning

Some people believe that teaching morality should be the foundation of education. Others believe that teaching a foundation of logical reasoning would do more to produce a moral society.

Logic is a weapon that the most cunning minds wield. Logic, however, is impervious to a certain extent to the norms of society and what can be deemed as acceptable. In the issue at hand, although we may agree to a certain degree that logical reasoning should form part of an individual’s knowledge acquisition and education, it is not advisable to completely neglect the importance of moral values. Where logic may be grasped at any age, morality needs to be inculcated from an early age.

Take for example the very famous characters by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle- Sherlock Holmes and his arch nemesis Jim Moriarty. In a battle of wits, reasoning and deduction, what is it that makes Holmes the protagonist and Moriarty the sly antagonist? Continue reading

Daring dreams & Ruthless realities

More often than not, we feel “Hey, you know what? There’s something I’d much rather be doing than what I’m doing at this exact moment.” Not too long ago, you were full of dreams and aspirations. No matter how wild the thoughts or how unattainable the ideas, all of it seemed so possible.

A friend was recently struck by the realization that despite being accepted into an esteemed university for a course that piqued his interest, it wasn’t his passion. He felt a dilettantish pull towards the academics at University. A month into his new life at Grad school, he understood where his true passion lay, and it most definitely was not what he was currently enrolled for. So what stopped him from pursuing his true passion in the first place?

Continue reading

Throwback to Teen Years and OH the Angst!

So I found this really old piece that I had written many years ago. So long ago that I don’t even recollect this style of writing anymore. Ah,teen angst. You got me. Here’s a little sneak peek at the adolescent me.


They always say that teenagers are rattled.Out of control.Hormone driven.Impulsive. Don’t ask me who ‘they’ are.Its just them.They’re just THERE.And their mission in life is to stamp down on our lives so hard as if crushing a cigarette butt to a point. I saw them getting crushed.Everyone.They gave me signs.They snapped at me.They remained mum for ages. “She sobbed every morning,the lights turned off in the room.Frustrated about everything that happened to her.She hated her life.She hated being who she was.She hated people who knew her.She hated people who didn’t.The kohl ran out of her red and desperate eyes.She scrubbed at her streaked face and plastered that painful smile on her face as they began to enter.They had grins on their faces.But they were much different from the empty motion of lips that she made.They were real.Her tinkling laughter was a mirage that nobody uncovered.Her cryptic words were undecipherable. And she went on through the year….Continue reading

Who are you?

Nobody is ever given the chance to program themselves right at birth. An infant isn’t asked his or her preference for anything after that first cry,that is the harbinger of a new addition to the world. A child is not given a questionnaire to fill stating likes and dislikes. Or a multiple choice form for things like “Do you want to be a) Rich b) Poor?” or even “Do you want to be a) Shy b) Gregarious?”

Then why, I ask, is it always said that who you fall in love with is a choice? You chose to fall in love with a man who doesn’t appreciate you. You chose to love someone from outside your caste. You chose to love an older woman. And of course, you chose to love someone of the same-sex. I feel very strongly about the discrimination against people who apparently “choose” who they love. It’s not that simple. It’s 2014 and I would hope our minds are evolved enough to understand the sundry layers and depths of this single notion of love. It’s not purely black and white. Continue reading

Delectable Delights

With Instagram and Twitter being all the rage, one picture that we cannot seem to avoid on social media is that of food. A vicarious feel of some meal a friend is enjoying. Add to this the Twitter fad of hashtags and you have millions of Instagrammers presenting pictures that are categorized as #foodgasm or #foodporn (Ehem,guilty!). So let’s delve deeper into this scrumptious post full of delicacies chosen from different cuisines! Food and travel go together; you can’t have one without the other, and if you do, it’s definitely unsatisfying. Unless, of course, you’re one of those people who regards eating as a menial everyday act. Oh, the horror! This post is dedicated to the foodies all over the world. Continue reading

The Love-Laughter Lady

With every passing day it seems like all I read about is some imminent war, natural disasters, collapsing government control. Basically anything under the Sun that is negative. Somehow, reading about it affects my mood a lot more than I anticipated. So I’ve been resorting to watching random Youtube videos of the usual funny animals, cute babies, silly animal and babies. I even went back to revisit those early early videos by YouTube star Ryan Higa to give myself a few laughs. Continue reading

Magic is Might

Straight off the bat let me just apologize to my readers for such a huge gap between my last post and this one. It’s been a busy time at the home front.

So, since we’re all so cyber-active I’m guessing you’ve all been exposed to the Ice Bucket Challenge, The 10 books challenge, The do things-online-which-may-or-may-not-make-a-difference challenge. I just want to say that although some of these are absolutely brilliant ideas, the others, not so much. I condemn the act of foolishly following in the steps of whatever is the current trend just because of it being a trend.

Now getting on with something less intense, let’s leave all our mundane problems in a small cupboard under the stairs and ride off on a journey to reminisce about a story, a life really, that has probably affected a lot of us. Or maybe it’s just been another novel series we enjoyed thoroughly.  Witty, charming, electrifying. These are just some qualities that the penmanship of J.K Rowling displays. And I’m still talking about her writing in general (read, Casual Vacancy & The Cuckoo’s Calling)

When years ago, I picked up a small hardbound book that my brother owned, I didn’t realize what an amazing piece of literary fiction magic I was holding in my hands. Honestly, I didn’t know about the Harry Potter series till then. Even as I read the book, I did not know that there were other parts to this marvelous tale. And guess what? I wasn’t even reading chronologically!  I had in my hands the third installment of the wizard’s story. And I was hooked. Despite having no background on the characters. This is the power of the written word. It compels you to force your imagination to work in overdrive, to let those creative juices flow and form a land where you are the master of all actions. Imagine my excitement when my brother told me there were more! 😛

It’s been a few years now, since our wait for another Potter novel has ended. The excitement to grab a copy of the newest installment.  To travel again to Hogwarts, despite our Muggle disposition and imagine ourselves as one of the many, sitting in the Great Hall and enjoying a year at the place which can always be called home. Continue reading

Tidal and vital

Let's talk about the L word...

Let it come aboard to fall short of each and every aspect you believed in. Growth residing in the failures, that’s a harsh reality to seize. It’s simple though. I’m your friend and I’m your lover, was, will be. I’m all that you did not notice. Now, different, better and you, I fear you can’t see the same realities I do. That we only get what we open ourselves to receive, that you don’t breathe the same wind as me. It’d smother you, maybe, it’s thick, but who am I to be a judge of the dimension of your winds’ wrath?

I wondered, that’s all and then I stopped with the wondering, except for when I’d find myself wondering again. Only so, I counted the time gap between those wonderings and evaluated the degree of my moving sparseness. How can disconnection be a motive for inner peace? As emptiness becomes more passable than whatever else…

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